HEEEEELP.. dickheads on the loose again!

9 Nov, '03

Jassim Al-Saidi in Bahrain's parliamentNot satisfied with pioneering and championing veiled women drivers by steamrolling and wasting the parliament’s time, this honourable gentleman tables a few more motions which are so important that should they succeed, they will ensure freedom of man for ever more.

Apart from that which has been reported, he very unfortunately had to withdraw another motion (yes he’s absolutely over-flowing with them as he is the only one working in the parliament) after being talked to by other completely self-serving MPs. What’s the withdrawn motion you ask? Oh nothing very important.. the RESTRICTION OF RELIGIOUS FREEDOMS! That is, the restriction of religious freedoms HE doesn’t subscribe to, like the Shia’s commemorating Ashoora which is the martyerdom of Imam Hussain – the grandson of the Prophet, every other Shia custom, and he lumped with those to sweeten the deal no doubt, Christmas, Easter, Yom Kippur, Divali and every other religious custom or right practiced by this varied and multi-cultural society of ours.

And of course he tabled this motion for the “better of Islam and Muslims” in Bahrain.

Jassim Al-SaidiHe most certainly should be lauded for his dedication and work. I mean, why else was he elected to the parliament in the first place? To serve the people? Naaaaahhhh, come ON people, get real. His only reason for being in parliament is to sow the seed of discrimitation against everybody who does not share his own extremely limited views. Does the picture of Osama bin Laden come up in your imagination now? YOU got it! I doubt very much that this guy and his ilk would hesitate a moment in condoning the attacks in Riyadh, Afghanistan or Iraq.

This is what Al-Asala in particular and the Islamists in general are good for. Whoever elects these jokers again deserve everything that the parliament does – or doesn’t do – for national interests.

We should really organise a demonstration of support and show these people our love and affection we harbour for them in our heart of hearts.

In other news: “Al-Saidi has now become the chairman of the wheels are turning but the hamster is fucking dead society” please join me in welcoming him on board!

fucking pricks.

Filed in: General

Comments (8)

Trackback URL | Comments RSS Feed

  1. anonymous says:

    HEEEEELP.. dickheads on the loose again!

    Great post. I showed it to an Egyption friend of mine. and he doesn’t like you all of a sudden.

    He’s an annoyingly strict muslim. 🙁

    I hate the was Muslims are potrayed but i also can’t stand the fundamentalists. Ya know its hard to defend folks that are also pissing you off. But you gotta do it.


  2. anonymous says:

    HEEEEELP.. dickheads on the loose again!

    Great and excellent post.

    I completely share your views and hate those stupid extremists with thier tight @ss views.

    You never see a no.1 student or college graduate try to be a “sheik” or Imam? I wonder why….is this donkey in the parliament our final resort in islam and passing laws

  3. anonymous says:

    HEEEEELP.. dickheads on the loose again!

    What a post! I share your views completely. Bahrain is not going back into time, its a country that has a good future ahead of them, and we should not tolerate and allow idiots like this dim-witted individual to get in our way. The guy should get a freak’n wake up call…

    Edmond Isa

  4. anonymous says:

    HEEEEELP.. dickheads on the loose again!

    ya all dickheads

  5. anonymous says:

    Re: HEEEEELP.. dickheads on the loose again!

    Oh Mahmood, this was a great ‘Rant’…
    That poor devil has a malnurished soul (& brain).
    One phrase that cracked me up, ’cause it could be taken in more then one way:
    ‘let’s attract investment AND corruption’

    I’m not anonymous:
    Miss Neuman Seattle, WA

  6. anonymous says:

    Re: HEEEEELP.. dickheads on the loose again!

    kut hehehehehehe

  7. anonymous says:

    Re: Little Mosque

    How fantastic! Really, this is the work of someone real, someone truly wonderful. Best wishes to the writer of this poem, you are gifted in many ways x

  8. anonymous says:

    Little Mosque

    Little Mosque Poems
    By Mohja Kahf

    In my little mosque
    there is no room for me
    to pray. I am
    turned away faithfully
    five times a day.

    My little mosque
    so meager
    in resources, yet
    so eager
    to turn away
    a woman
    or a stranger

    My little mosque
    is penniless, behind on rent
    Yet it is rich in anger
    every Friday, coins of hate
    are generously spent

    My little mosque is poor yet
    every week we are asked to give
    to buy another curtain
    to partition off the women
    or to pave another parking space

    I go to the Mosque of the Righteous
    I have been going there all my life
    I have been the Cheerleader of the Righteous Team
    I have mocked the visiting teams cruelly
    I am the worst of those I complain about:
    I am a former Miss Mosque Banality

    I would like to build
    a little mosque
    without a dome
    or minaret
    I’d hang a sign
    over the door:
    Bad Muslims
    welcome here
    Come in, listen
    to some music,
    sharpen the souls longing,
    have a cigarette

    I went to the mosque
    when no one was there
    and startled two angels
    coming out of a broom closet
    Are they gone now? one said
    The looked relieved

    My great big mosque
    has a chandelier
    big as a Christmas tree
    and a jealously guarded
    lock and key
    I wonder why
    everyone in it
    looks just like me

    My little mosque
    has a bouncer at the door
    You have to look pious
    to get in

    My little mosque
    has a big sense of humor

    I went to the mosque
    when no one was there
    The prayer space was soft and serene
    I heard a sound like lonely singing
    or quiet sobbing. I heard a leafy rustling
    I looked around
    A little Quran
    on a low shelf
    was reciting itself

    My little mosque has a Persian carper
    depicting trees of paradise
    in the mens section, which you enter
    through a lovely classical arch
    The womens section features
    well, nothing

    Piety dictates that men enter
    my little mosque through magnificent columns
    Piety dictates
    that women enter
    my little mosque
    through the back alley,
    just past the crack junkie here
    and over these fallen garbage cans

    My little mosque used to be democratic
    with a rotating imam
    we chose from among us every month
    Now my little mosque has an appointed imam
    trained abroad
    No one can dispute his superior knowledge

    We used to use our minds
    to understand Quran
    My little mosque discourages
    that sort of thing these days
    We have official salaried translators
    for God

    I used to carry around a little mosque
    in the chambers of my heart
    but it is closed indefinitely pending
    extensive structural repairs

    I miss having a mosque,
    driving by and seeing cars lining the streets,
    people double-parking, desperate
    to catch the prayer in time
    I miss noticing, as they dodge across traffic
    toward the mosque entrance between
    buses and trucks,
    their long chemises fluttering,
    that trail of gorgeous fabrics Muslims leave
    gossamer, the colors of hot lava, fantastic shades
    from the glorious places of the earth

    I miss the stiff, uncomfortable men
    looking anywhere but at me when they meet me,
    and the double-faced women
    full of judgment, and their beautiful
    childing shining
    with my chidren, I do

    I don’t dream of a perfect mosque
    I just want roomfuls of people to kiss every week
    with the kisses of Prayer and Serenity,
    and a fat, multi-trunked tree
    collecting us loosely for a minute under
    its alive and quivering canopy

    Once, God applied
    for a janitor position at our mosque,
    but the board turned him down
    because he wasn’t a practicing Muslim

    Once a woman entered
    my little mosque
    with a broken arm,
    a broken heart,
    and a very short skirt
    Everyone rushed over to her
    to make sure
    she was going to cover her legs

    Marshmallows are banned
    from my little mosque
    because they might
    contain gelatin derived from pork enzymes
    but banality is not banned,
    and yet verily
    banality is worse than marshmallows

    Music is banned
    at my little mosque
    because it is plaed on
    the devils stringed instruments,
    although a little music
    softens the soul
    and lo, a hardened soul
    is the devils taut drumskin

    Once an ignorant Bedouin
    got up and started to pee against a wall
    in the Prophets Mosque in Medina
    The pious protective Companions leapt
    to beat him
    The Prophet bade them stop
    A man is entitled to finish a piss
    even if he is an uncouth idiot,
    and there are things
    more important in a mosque than ritual purity

    My little mosque
    thinks a poem like this must be
    written by the Devil
    in cahoots with the Zionists,
    NATO, and the current US administration,
    as part of the Worldwide Orientalist Plot
    to Discredit Islam
    Don’t they know
    at my little mosque
    that this is a poem
    written in the mirror
    by a lover?

    My little mosque
    is fearful to protect itself
    from the bricks of bigots
    throught its window
    Doesn’t my little mosque know
    the way to protect its windows
    is to open its doors?

    I know the bricks of bigots
    are real
    I wish I could protect my little mosque
    with my body as a shield

    I love my dysfunctional little mosque
    even though I can’t stand it

    My little mosque loves Arab men
    with pure accents and beards
    Everyone else is welcome
    as long as
    they understand that Real Islam
    has to come from an Arab man

    My little mosque loves Indian
    and Pakistani men with Maududi in their pockets
    Everyone else is welcome because as we all know
    there is no discrimination in Islam

    My little mosque loves women
    who know that Islam liberated them
    fourteen hundred years ago and so
    they should live like seventh-century Arabian women
    or at least dress
    like pre-industrial pre-colonial women
    men can adjust with the times

    My little mosque loves converts
    especially white men and women
    who give Why I embraced Islam lectures
    to be trotted out as trophies
    by the Muslim pom-pom squad
    of Religious One-up-man-ship

    My little mosque faints at the sight
    of pale Bosnian women suffering
    across the sea
    Black women suffering
    across the street
    do not move
    my little mosque much

    I would like to find a little mosque
    where my Christian grandmother
    and my Jewish great-uncle the rebbe
    and my Buddhist cousin
    and my Hindu neighbor
    would be as welcome
    as my staunchly Muslim mom and dad

    My little mosque has young men and women
    who have nice cars, nice homes, expensive educations,
    and think they are the righteous rageful
    Victims of the World Persecution

    My little mosque offers courses on
    the Basics of Islamic Cognitive Dissonance
    There is no racism in Islam means
    we won’t talk about it
    Islam is unity means
    There’s so much to learn
    Class is free and meets every week

    I don’t dream of a perfect mosque, only
    a few square inches of ground
    that will welcome my forehead,
    no questions asked

    My little mosque is as decrepit
    as my little heart. Its narrowness
    is the narrowness in me. Its windows
    are boarded up like the part of me that prays

    I went to the mosque
    when no one was there
    No One was sweeping up
    She said: This place is just a place
    Light is everywhere. Go, live in it
    The Mosque is under your feet,
    wherever you walk each day

    Parts of this poem have been published in Azizah Magazine.

Back to Top