It’s 11 days to Christmas and I haven’t done any shopping yet, I think this year I might as just bring out my “Muslim” card, grow a beard for a few days and look up, lifting my head while declaring to a household that has got used to celebrating every religion’s holidays that we shall now just celebrate Muslim holidays exclusively. How much credibility do you think that will carry?
Yeah. None.
Therefore I am indentured to do my Xmas shopping extraviganza with the wifypoo this Friday.
That got moi thinking… What should I ask (wish, wish of course, not ask) for this festive season? That got moi thinking of prezzies. But as I have most of the things I want, by virtue of the fact that I just go ahead and BUY the things I want rather than add them to a list (too impatient), there is really nothing that I can ask for… Except of course for:
1. LCD display
2. Nokia 6630
3. A young and luscious wife who views my girth as pure sex appeal!
What? Isn’t Christmas the season of hope?
not much chance of that happening!
Comments
Christmas shopping
Mahmood,
You already have a young and beautiful wife…..her name is Frances!
Re: Christmas shopping
Hey, your forget that I’ve got three more to go, being a Mulsim..
Frances has been BEGGING me to select my second wife, as long as I promise to leave her alone! 🙂
Christmas shopping
Mahmood,
Does your wifypoo ever read this blog? I’m thinking after this post you’ll be running your site from the doghouse with a mad-as-hell wifypoo throwing pots and pans around the kitchen.
Duck!
Steve
Christmas shopping
Steve
Even IF Francis (who is a very nice lady) tossed Mahmood into the doghouse, don’t forget said doghouse is the size of a US Master Bedroom and has AC and EASY access to the pool.
Re: Christmas shopping
Whenever my husband complains about something, I tell him why don’t you go merry a second wife, maybe she will treat you better? My husband has the same answer
انا مش قادر على واØÂÂÂده علشانابتلش بالثانيه؟
I call that sharing the burden! 🙂
… is she really? I’d love some help too!
Translation please!
انا مش قادر على واØÂÂÂده علشانابتلش بالثانيه؟
?
Re: Christmas shopping
Maybe they need to build some of those doghouses in the DC area so we normal people in DC can afford a home. A 744 square foot one bedroom condo next to a Metro station goes for $303,000 here plus another $220 for condo fees. That doghouse looks pretty good to me.
Steve
Re(1): Christmas shopping
My theory is that you are secretly a Texan hiding out in Bahrain. I may start calling you “Bubba”.
Steve
Re(2): Christmas shopping
😆
Christmas shopping
Hello Mahmood I was thinking about something you said onetime when I was at the Bahrain court building. I was sitting there waiting to pick up a paper and here comes this dude wearing a semi-blue colored thobe that has to be about 10 inches from the ground, and dont get me wrong I like beards but this dude cannot grow one and is still trying scragily
looking thing looks pretty horrible. Well I started laughing to myself and being a wetsern guy in a room full of Bahrainis I stuck out pretty good, when a Bahraini pilot I know walks in and says hey whats so funny and I point to santas elf over yonder and he just shakes his head and says this is not correct to wear a thobe like this. So my wish for Christmas is that this dude gets a thobe that fits and grows a nice bushy beard with no patchy spots.
Christmas shopping
Yes, we are all alike. We want the same things, have the same desires. That is why the nonsense that some people put out about a “clash of civilisations” and that the Arab world thinks this, or the west thinks that, is rubbish. We are all the same.
As an American married to a lady from the Gulf, I can attest, in a better way than most Americans, that the people of the area have far more in common with us than they are different, no matter what the bin Ladens and the bigots in the west tell you. Of course they want to purpetuate and promote any differences, what would they do without them.
Here is the people worldwide who revel and rejoice in the fact that we are all the same!
Cheers!
Christmas shopping
Steve,
Most people I know here in the DC area commute. Unless you are independently wealthy, it costs too much to have a nice sized house close to DC. I work right next to the pentagon, but I live out near Chantilly. Takes me 45 minutes each way, on a good day.
With your dislike of Arabs, DC is a funny place to live! I gather you dont spend much time at Tyson’s Galleria on the weekends? It is kind of like going shopping in Dubai. Khalejee everywhere!
Malik-The American. lol
Christmas shopping
My wife has always said she would let me have a second wife if I could find another Saudi woman, and her family, willing to let her marry me! LOL! She quickly retracted this offer when we went to the Gulf and she saw how interested the local women were in a Saudi woman, married to an American man. Like a Yemeni lady said to us at our wedding “We need more men like your husband”.
It is surprising how many Arab women, especially from the Gulf, would marry westerners if they could. They get to leave the cultural rubbish behind. I know several American converts married to Arabs, Palestinian, Jordanian, and two others married to Saudi women.
Malik-Member of the human race.
Re: Christmas shopping
To me nationality doesn’t even come close in this situation. Only love does. It doesn’t matter if you were a Martian and she was from Bahrain as long as there is mutual love and respect.
As for “cultural baggage,” well, I’ve made my thoughts be known.
Christmas shopping
You know, sometimes I remember that old picture of Mahmood lounging on his couch and if I squint my eyes just right he looks like some suburban dad from Dallas. Ditch the thobe and put him in some blue jeans, an old T-shirt, and a gimme cap and you could spot him doing yard work in Addison with a big Suburban parked in the driveway. Probably a bass boat, too. He wouldn’t have to say much to get by with being a Texan, just say “Yup” every now and then and “Gimme ‘nuther longneck.”
Just thought I would share that with you.
Steve
Re: Translation please!
“I can’t handle one, so would I want the problems of the second?”
😀
Re: I call that sharing the burden! 🙂
oh wow! Is all I have to say Sandee! You’ve been gone a while… you must have bought another car by now!! 😀 😆
Re: Christmas shopping
But their numbers are going down of late, or is that (wishfull) imagination?
I know what you’re talking about though, Santa’s Helpers is an apt name for them, and we all really know who Santa really is, don’t we?
Re: Christmas shopping
That’s the point, we’re not all that different!
… you know me all too well! YES actually!
[i]I’m picking it up this weekend![/i] I didn’t take any pictures of it yet – but this is a very close rendering from the Porsche site. Same wheels, silly spoiler, hardtop and everything. I sold my car last weekend – going to a good home in Pennsylvania.
Just in time for the snow – a 911 cab 4X4 with heated seats – what more can I ask for (thinking thinking thinking)?
[img]http://s91595436.onlinehome.us/cars/C4Cab.jpg[/img]
Re(1): Christmas shopping
Yep.. That is about what prices are around OUTSIDE of Boston.300K for a condo 350+k for a 2 bedroom home. I am only kidding about Mahmood’s doghouse being huge by the way. I think Mahmood did mention it did have AC but if you consider temps in the summer can be 120+ it makes sense.
Just bite the bullet and buy or keep your eyes open for the right deal. We did and found a real bargin. The cost was still insane but as Tony Soprano would say “Whadda yous goin’ to do?”. Still if we lived in the Mid West I would be living off the 13th fairway at the Golf Club and have more money to burn for what we paid..
Christmas shopping
It isnt too difficult for Saudi women to meet western or American men, there are large Saudi communities right here in the USA. You say you live in the DC area, go to Tyson’s Galleria, they’ll be at least 100-200 Saudi or Khalejee men and women there at any one time. Try going to Skyline, in the Ethiopian shopping area there is a place called, The Prince, I think, lots of Saudis go there, men and women.
I guess the harder part is to find a western or American man who is also a Muslim, but there are actually more out here than you might think. Makes for a great and scary “Fifth column” plot. We know two other Saudi women married to American guys. One is married to a doctor here in the DC area, another married to a professor of mathematics in Kansas. We know a few other Khaleej women married to Americans as well.
Were do they meet? Many places, school, the mosque, mutual friends. Just like anyone else does. The realities of the situation get more complicated when talking about getting the okay from the family. Trust me, I was VERY nervous meeting my perspective bride’s family, but it went great, they loved me. I have to laugh back on it, I remember brushing up on my Arabic, trying to make sure I had a few more verses of The Qur’an memorized as well as some more finer points of Islam down, in case there was any question about my dedication to my faith and the amount of time I had been a Muslim, but none of that happened. The biggest hurdle we are facing is getting Saudi government recognition for our marriage, which is turning out to be much more difficult. There is nothing in the religion that would keep them from recognizing it, it is just cultural crap, like most of what happens in Saudi that they try to pass off as “religious”. I have made Mahmood aware of the issues I am having with the Saudi government. Needless to say, after many incidents with the Embassy here and Prince Bandars private secretary, I am not a big fan of the government.
As to what other Arab women think and ask about, specifically Gulf women, it usually has everything to do with the way the relationship between us works. No matter how “westernized” a guy from the area becomes, it just seems there is just a certain amount of that cultural baggage that is left. My wife’s friends are always very surpised out how close we are, how we interact with each other. They are always surprised with the things my wife confides in me and the things she tells me. Women in the area are always taught to not tell everything to their husbands, to always keep somethings secret. I have heard this a million times from my wife’s friends “I can’t believe you told him that”……
For me the hardest part of adjusting to marriage with an Arab woman, especially one from the gulf, was the great divide that we Americans have with people from the area when it comes to personal hygine. I have never met a group of people so fanatical about personal hygine in my life. I, as an American bachelor, prided myself on being a rather clean and organised person. My American friends actually gave me a hard time about it. When I married my Saudi wife, it turns out that I was a complete barbarian. LOL! Any American who has had close dealings with the people from the area will understand what I am saying.
The one question I have had, and have never had answered, is why when you consider how fanatical Arabs are about their personal hygine and the way they keep their house so clean, do they have such an awful habit of just throwing trash any and everywhere?
Malik-The Human
Christmas shopping
Steve,
You work across the freeway from the Pentagon huh? Interesting, I have one of my offices in Crystal City. Right here. Small world eh?
Malik-The Human
Christmas shopping
Steve,
Khalijee is a termed used to describe people from the gulf. It takes me 30-40 minutes to get from 50 and Centerville Road to Crystal City, this is if I leave at 6.10. Wait until 7.00 and it can take you an hour plus. Coming back is always longer. Once took me 2 1/2 hours to get home.
As to women, I have always liked Arabic women, interesting when I was raised in a family where both of my parents were officers in the military, and my dad was really racist, he especially didnt like Arabs. Until I moved to this area I didnt realise how attractice Ethiopian and Eritrean women are either.
Back to the marring the Saudi woman thing, the families can come visit over here all the time, although since 9/11 it is harder. My wife’s family, the immidiate portion of it anyways, lives here anyways. All four sisters graduated from George Mason, the oldest did post grad at American University and ended up teaching at Mason for awhile before moving back to Saudi where she is the principle of a girls school.
It is funny, but often when I am asked by Arabs where my wife comes from and I say Saudi they dont believe me. I used to threaten to carry a copy of her Saudi passport so people dont think I am lying. But one Arab, who was actually using his head, said “I thought so, your Arabic sounds Hijazi”.
Malik-American by accident.
Re: … you know me all too well! YES actually!
I’ll bet $20 you have a speeding ticket before the month is out. This is like a dream catch for a bored traffic cop.
Steve
Re: Christmas shopping
Malik,
I don’t dislike Arabs, just the kill-crazy ones who want to bag an American infidel as their ticket to paradise. Most of the Arab people I meet are fine, except for the occassional jerk. Then again, most of the people I meet are OK, except for the occassional jerk.
I work across the freeway from the Pentagon. I live on the same side of town as you and go to the Galleria all the time, mostly to Crane’s but also Nieman’s and the Cheesecake Factory and that Italian place, Maggiano’s. I haven’t noticed foreigners at the mall but then the DC area is too full of foreigners to take notice and I only notice the pretty women anyway.
Now that you mention it, I guess some of the striking women do have an Arabic look. And I guess I have heard families speaking Arabic there. I don’t need to remember my college Arabic (which I have forgotten) to understand what they are saying: It’s the international language of families everywhere. The kid is crying for a toy. The mother says maybe he can have it later. The father says put it down, you’re not getting it, let’s go. Really, all you need to hear is the tone of voice to understand the conversation.
What does “khalejee” mean?
We’ve probably passed each other at the Pentagon City mall. The guy who runs the Alamo flag shop there is Palestinian who calls himself a Texan. He’s a pretty good guy though a little too caffeinated. His valuable contribution to society is to have found an endless stream of cute Eastern European chicks to staff his souvenir shops around the city.
I don’t know how you drive in to the Pentagon in 45 minutes from Chantilly. You must have a secret tunnel to the Pentagon. I’ll probably end out there in the hinterlands, if I can find a house that doesn’t require a hundred year mortgage.
Steve
Re: Christmas shopping
Hmmm. That’s interesting. There was a cute Indian girl in my MBA program who went on to another master’s program in economics after she graduated to stretch out her free life at the university and avoid returning to her arranged marriage. She may still be there, collecting more degrees. She didn’t want to return to India where her life would not be her own.
So what kind of questions did the Saudi women have about your relationship? Wouldn’t it be difficult for an American man to meet a Saudi woman? Other than the cultural stuff, I would think that it would be hard for a Saudi woman to leave her home for a strange land and leave her family behind. I’m thinking of the English war brides who married American GIs during WWII and came back to America with their husbands. Many of them regretted it because moving here cut them off from their families.
Steve
Re(1): Translation please!
Exactly. Obviously this whole multiple wives thing is the source of much of the unrest in the Middle East. I couldn’t handle it those few times when I juggled two girlfriends, let alone wives. And you know they would gang up on you. I can just see opening the door after a long day’s work to find two, TWO, wives standing there, arms crossed, with scowls on their faces for something I did, which could be anything, and the fact that I didn’t know what it was that ticked them off is proof of my uncaring brutishness.
One’s Plenty,
Steve
Re(1): Christmas shopping
I’ve dated some Martians, Mahmood. They make fun girlfriends but they’re not really Wife Material.
Steve
Re(2): Translation please!
Except that legally (and Islamically, I am almost sure) you are not allowed to have two wives in the same home. They’ve got to be separated, each in a different abode.
Re: … you know me all too well! YES actually!
Wow, congratulations! Enjoy but don’t drive too fast! 😉
Re: Christmas shopping
I have noticed that Ethiopean women tend to be good-looking, well-groomed, well-dressed, and well-mannered. Don’t think I’ve run into any Eritreans that I know of.
Steve
Re: Christmas shopping
The biggest hurdle we are facing is getting Saudi government recognition for our marriage, which is turning out to be much more difficult. There is nothing in the religion that would keep them from recognizing it, it is just cultural crap, like most of what happens in Saudi that they try to pass off as “religious”. I have made Mahmood aware of the issues I am having with the Saudi government. Needless to say, after many incidents with the Embassy here and Prince Bandars private secretary, I am not a big fan of the government.
[quote]
What kinds of problems does the Saudi embassy give you? Of course, I’m no fan of the Saudi government either. I was just walking by the embassy on the way to a concert and snapped a picture and a Saudi guy in a suit jumped out and hassled me. So it’s not hard to believe the Saudi embassy is full of *$&#s.
Maybe it’s something like the South Korean government, which does not grant marriage approvals easily to South Korean women marrying GIs headed out of country for America. Or maybe they have worse reasons.
Steve